It’s that time of the week again. Friday Fictioneers! Thank you once more to Rochelle Wisoff-Fields for hosting this fine challenge every week. We all thank you!
THE CHALLENGE:
Write a one hundred word story that has a beginning, middle and end. (No one will be ostracized for going over or under the word count.)
THE KEY:
Make every word count.
Come join us! It’s great fun and practice for your writing. Everyone is friendly and helpful. If you would like to read more stories please click on Rochelle’s name above and then scroll down to the blue frog. Thank you!
copyright-Rich Voza
*Genre ~ Fiction* (100 words)
The sun rose over the horizon. Bright, new beginning. For the day and for herself. The plane would be boarding soon. The first flight out that she could book. She had one suitcase. Not much to show for ten years. Except the baggage she carried inside her soul.
She smiled. She felt the heaviness leave her heart as the sun rose higher. Ten years of her life wasted. Imprisoned. Now she was free.
It took her the full ten years to plot out her revenge. He was going to pay for his betrayal.
This is really good. It’s nice that she was able to get away.
Thank you!
So, she was successful and she had loads of patience! Nice one, Jackie. Planes makes me think of fresh starts, too.
thank you Amy, yeah it’s always worked for me, the planes and fresh starts
Good for her, she’ll do well
I believe she will
I think this was my favorite line: “Except the baggage she carried inside her soul.” That’s the heaviest baggage of all. You have me wondering what the betrayal was. If revenge is a dish best served cold, she’s in good shape!
janet
Thank you Janet. Ah yes, I’m thinking it was something really terrible. She has been planning 10 years, patience has it own rewards.
“He was going to pay for his betrayal.” Looks like her revenge is still to come–any hints? Good story.
it could be anything you want
thank you
Oh Jackie, I didn’t see that end coming…I thought more like freedom for herself from stuff other than a man and his betrayal…very well done. I like the build up leading to a great ending.
Thank you boomie! I always appreciate you reading and commenting.
oooohhh. *shivers*
yeah, a woman on a mission bwahahaha
“she had one suitcase”–love the simplicity of this line.
thank you!
the baggage she carried inside her soul — i like this ^^
but oh god, what’s she planning to do now? i mean revenge is great and all but i hope she doesn’t end up in prison again. freedom and being happy is after all the greatest revenge.i hope she changes her mind..
on second thought, maybe he really should have it. lol
great story ^^
I think she was a good woman done wrong by a bad man.
thank you kz.
nothing bums a guy out like a girl who has ten years of PO’dness gunning for him. Good one
If I was that man I would be afraid, very afraid. Thanks for reading
You took me by surprise right off the bat. When I first saw the picture, I remembered how much I liked flying at sunset, yet you saw a sunrise and a new beginning. Cool. Of course there couldn’t be a tidy, sweet ending. Revenge is on that horizon!
Very nice, as usual.
I love taking people by surprise.
I love flying, and sometimes revenge ……..thanks Maddie!
The baggage she carried in her soul – LOVED that line. Great job.
thank you Shirley!
Jackiee PPPPP,
Hope you are feeling better this week. I think you are because you are making plans for revenge! That is one long wait…wouldn’t want to cross her path.
Tom
I’m my usual self Tom PPPP, thank you. Not sure that’s a good thing or not.
Ah yes revenge, I wouldn’t want to cross her path either. She is a patient one.
Good to hear.
Like others, I love the baggage in her soul line. I also like how her soul lightens with the rising sun. Hate to be the clean up crew at the crime scene. Great post, Jackie.
Thank you Kozo!
Dear jackie,
your story was great until the last two lines, then it became greater! Revenge is a dish often served on airline flights and you captured the onset of one plan perfectly.
Aloha,
Doug
Thank you very much Doug! Appreciate you reading
scary for the one who betrayed her..Looks like she has a lot of plans..made a good read..
thank you so much
She should dump the baggage, and the revenge. Just be free. On the other hand…. Nice hook, well done.
Well maybe she will once she is on that plane with the freedom. Thanks for reading Sandra
I’m thinking this might be a tiny bit autobiographical? I really enjoyed this – especially her spirits lifting with the sun. Lovely writing
If it is autobiographical it is only the plane ride and freedom. I’m not patient enough to wait 10 years for revenge.
thanks for reading El, appreciate it as always.
How incredibly sad that more of her life will be wasted.
In a way, so true, but maybe she will change her mind once she is up in the air with freedom.
I too loved the comparison between the suitcase and the baggage. The last line, brilliant.
Thank you so much t!
Dear Jackie,
I’ll echo everyone else. Loved the baggage line. Whoever this jerk is he’d better watch out. Ten years to plot revenge is a long time.
good job!
Shalom,
Rochelle
thank you so much Rochelle!
Good one, Jackie! This guy had better watch out
Yes he should, she is a woman on a mission.
Good one, and I think that the guy in my sonnet is actually the counterpart.
oh yes, I read it. Could be
So I guess coming after is not his best idea.
Maybe not this time, but you never know, maybe if he did go after she would drop her feelings of revenge. It’s been known to happen. I believe in happy endings
ten years? oh, she’s gotta let it go. good luck to her. well done.
Women have been known to change their minds rich, so she just might let it go.
Very good …. and in some ways, timely for me …. (the first half) … my current posts explains. … meanwhile, I just wanted to make sure to stop by to say Hi Jackie.
hey Frank! Was wondering where you went off to. I am going to go read your post now, how did I miss it? I’m so glad you stopped by! Thank you.
Good story. Could continue into so many different genres in the manner in which she offloads, or doesn’t, that baggage. ‘Baggage’ of the soul and ‘real’ baggage, is a good play on words. Ann
Thank you so much Ann!
I hope however your character ditches the route to revenge. It’s a waste of creative energy. And saps one’s spiritual powers!
Ten years! That plan had better work!
It might not! thanks for reading Abraham